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But Not the Hippopotamus
and other strange things
I was diagonosed with strep on Wednesday and put on antibiotics. There are several warning labels on the bottle, lets investigate:
1.) In really BIG CAPITAL LETTERS and bold print, along with a picture of a loaf of bread it says "Take Medication with Food." This translates roughly to "this medicine is going to upset your stomach, but if you take it on a stomach full of starch or protein then it will at least be a one way trip and not make a u-turn."
2.) The second warning is closely related to the first. The picture this time is of a water faucet with droplets hanging forever suspended over the top part of a glass. "This medication be taken with plenty of water." The words plenty and water are bolded, so I'm guessing soda and coffee don't cut it. Plenty is sort of arbitrary, though, don't you think? My grandfather thought it was "plenty of water" for the day if he rinsed after brushing his teeth! Anyhow, this one translates into "remember how we warned you this drug was really going to do a number on your digestive track? Well, if you drink your weight in water you won't wind up in the emergency room from dehydration."
3.) The third one is unrelated to the first two, and while I appreciate the "warning" I figured this one out all on my own the first time I took it. "This medication may havea bitter taste if chewed or crushed. Swallow medication whole." The picture shows a little capsule in between what I now know are teeth, but might have had a hard time guessing out of context. Anyhow, yeah. After one dose you learn pretty quickly to not let this stuff touch your tongue, lips or the roof of your mouth. You also don't want the fingers you used to put it in to touch anything you might later taste. Take medicine, wash hands.
The worst part? This is twice a day stuff for ten days. Three days down. Seven to go. Wish me luck.
1.) In really BIG CAPITAL LETTERS and bold print, along with a picture of a loaf of bread it says "Take Medication with Food." This translates roughly to "this medicine is going to upset your stomach, but if you take it on a stomach full of starch or protein then it will at least be a one way trip and not make a u-turn."
2.) The second warning is closely related to the first. The picture this time is of a water faucet with droplets hanging forever suspended over the top part of a glass. "This medication be taken with plenty of water." The words plenty and water are bolded, so I'm guessing soda and coffee don't cut it. Plenty is sort of arbitrary, though, don't you think? My grandfather thought it was "plenty of water" for the day if he rinsed after brushing his teeth! Anyhow, this one translates into "remember how we warned you this drug was really going to do a number on your digestive track? Well, if you drink your weight in water you won't wind up in the emergency room from dehydration."
3.) The third one is unrelated to the first two, and while I appreciate the "warning" I figured this one out all on my own the first time I took it. "This medication may havea bitter taste if chewed or crushed. Swallow medication whole." The picture shows a little capsule in between what I now know are teeth, but might have had a hard time guessing out of context. Anyhow, yeah. After one dose you learn pretty quickly to not let this stuff touch your tongue, lips or the roof of your mouth. You also don't want the fingers you used to put it in to touch anything you might later taste. Take medicine, wash hands.
The worst part? This is twice a day stuff for ten days. Three days down. Seven to go. Wish me luck.